Principles, Schmincipals...
2002-12-21 . 1:19 p.m.

Righto then. Couple of days gone by. Unca Fwetch has been hogging the computer at home moving his whole fucking diary (all 260 odd entries) and shockingly alcoholism at my place of employ is frowned upon.

What the hell is that about? It's nearly Christmas. Now I don't do Christmas as such but I do allow myself to double in weight through food and alcohol over the period of three or four days. Why should I not be allowed to drink at work?

In fact - i am working 12 hours straight boxing day (double time + huge great big bonus before you ask) so I'm going to pack an alco-picnic with me and see exactly how drunk I can get before -

a: I get sacked.

b: Customers pick up on the fact that they are talking to a pisshead.

c: I get bored and go to a pub.

sounds like fun to little old me anyway.

Sorry about all that. Completely random type monkey-sputum. Not what I was intending to write about at all. ahem... (starting over)

I could have some sex if I wanted to. Oh yes. Very probably. There are two people within this very office who would bend over backwards (or forwards - I'm fairly flexible) for me in that department. But I say "NAY!" I have principles.

Ooooohhhhh... Ominous emboldened word...

I have printed a Wanted Singles T-Shirt before but to be honest it was very, very loose indeed. I have so many minimum requirements for a future relationship that it really is no wonder at all I don't get laid (like, ever).

I was thinking about this 'cos of the Nicola situation. She has done two things which kinda make me uneasy about the whole thing. I didn't have a definite chance with her in the first instance but now I'm not so sure that even if I did that I would go ahead with it. Firstly, she cheated on her boyfriend so he would dump her. Secondly, she got drunk and slept with her ex.

People who have read my whole background may be aware of what I think of that.

Basically, I aim too high, but I refuse to lower my minimum standards because I don't want to meet anybody who isn't 100% perfect. If this means I never date another person ever again as long as I live then so be it. I have got used to the idea of being alone but I refuse to compromise my beliefs and requirements. It's stubbornness and also that I am bored of being cheated on, fucked with, robbed by, ruined by (etc.) women who are just plain bad for me.

And I have the worst skill at recognising these people.

As you can tell I am slightly p*ssed off with the fairer sex (hahahahaha! fairer? like how?) and so I shall extend my sexual sabbatical for time to come. I think the problem stems from the whole "What the bloody hell do you actually want from us?" attitude that men have at the moment.

Women want a strong, silent, manly bastard who is sensitive, good with children and can tear the head off a lion with a passing wave of his hand whilst discussing Rimbaud and arrangig flowers. They want the most stupendous badass in the universe one day and some soppy git the next.

Just make your goddamn minds up would you?

Until then I shall carry on, single, alone a Second Class Male looking for a First Class Female.