2002-12-06 . 10:33 p.m.
I've got a bit of an issue with Michael Jackson. I understand that he lives in a fairy-tale world and that what us "normal" people do in life is not somethnig that affects him, but I have to say that the fairy-tale world seems to be crumbling around him.
If you remember any of the old tales told by the Brothers Grimm and suchlike you may recall that they often feature little creatures that come to your house at night to manipulate things. You may even have placed a tooth under your pillow as a child to get some money from the Tooth Fairy.
MJ seems to have a serious problem with these guys. Now, I don't know how he sleeps in bed at night (in an oxygen tent, avec un singe?) but I think he must sleep with the pillow over his face 'cos every time he appears in the public eye he has different nose.
Perhaps he hasn't made quite enough money from making two of the top selling albums of all time that he has to stick his nose under the pillow to earn some extra pocket money. I'm not sure...
Which is an awfully long-winded introduction to the concept of plastic surgery.
As i have mentioned before in my diary, I intend to grow old into some haggard, crabby old codger with wrinkles and white hair. I'm quite looking forward to looking distinguished with peppered grey hairs. I also understand that some people are unhappy with the concept of growing old (particularly women who have been attractive in their youth). But it's all body-image.
I may be lucky in some respects. I am six foot three and of slim build. I have never really "piled on the pounds" and become drastically overweight but there seems to be a problem today in that people are unwilling to work at changing their body image.
Looking at what people will do to make themselves look better scares the hell out of me. People spending $20,000 on their teeth for heaven's sake. Sucking fat through a tube. Cutting their skin to tighten up their face. Injecting toxins into their foreheads to remove frown lines. SEVERING A TENDON AT THE BASE OF THEIR PENIS FOR AN EXTRA 1/2 INCH.
I am not perfect. Not by any strecth of the imagination, I have bodily defects like most and there are parts of my body that I don't like - but I wouldn't change it. Not for anything. If I absolutely had to I would do it through hard work, not money. I have been lifting weights for a couple of months now and do so twice a day if possible. I do sit ups, press ups and all sorts of other crap. I do this because I was a gaunt and scrawny figure after my break up with Laura. I used to eat once every three or four days, and even then only a couple of pieces of dry bread. I drank only water because it cost me nothing. I went from 214lbs to 175lbs in about 5 weeks (that is not healthy kids).
Now I'm getting big again - and I like it. I have more energy and more focus. I'm not going to turn into one of those huge muscular idiots you see at the gym, that's not my target. What I have done is set myself a body image I want - and now I'm just tuning my physicality to that.
What I am trying to say is that if you are one of those people who hates your body - don't. Despite the words of Fight Club - you are a beautiful and unique snowflake. All of you. Every single one of you has something about you that no-one else has. This in an advantage in that it makes you an individual. There is nothing worse than being part of a crowd.
Free yourself from genre. Accentuate your strong points and excise your weak points. Go to the gym, go on a diet - do what you need to do to make yourself happy. Make yourself what you want to be but don't ever follow the mandates set down by fashion and modern culture. You don't have to be wafer-thin with blonde hair and big breasts. You don't have to be a muscle-bound hunk in Calvin Kleins.
As a final note take this advice from my dad - "When you go out, don't care too much about what people think about you - they will all be too worried about how good they look, or act. Be yourself and the real friends; the best friends, can judge you for your honesty. They are the ones you want close to you"
Don't try and be something you're not. Much love to all of you out there unhappy with yourselves. I hope this entry may work as an inspiration to you.
Thanks.
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