If You Build It They Will Come!
2002-08-31 . 9:30 a.m.

Sorry about the title - I always wanted to have an excuse to use that. Today's first entry (oh yes, I'm planning more! Mwa-ha-ha!) has been provisionally given the secondary title of

drum roll please

My Son Dylan and His Future

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In my humble and somewhat unhinged fashion I have been planning the future skills of my son. Now a lot of parents go through this, if you have children then maybe you too have done this. The difference lies in the way I see the world. Most people will be thinking about their child's future and wonder what college s/he will go to and whether they will be a famous actor/politican/shrimp-farmer.

My problem is a very simple one. I've watched too many Kung Fu films.

As a result I am teaching my son the martial skills exhibited by the finest stars of Kung Fu films churned out by the likes of Golden Harvest (one of the greatest Kung Fu studios of Hong Kong). At the age of two and a half he can already walk unaided across raised platforms at walking speed without losing balance and what's more he enjoys it. Add to this the fact that I am teaching him the classic Northern style known as "Boshing Misters" and I figure by the time he hits about 16 he should have one of those white beards and spend his days walking around wearing an orange towel, carrying a big stick and dispensing mystical Zen guidance to all and sundry.

Other skills and teachings I feel it necessary for "the boy" to learn include playing guitar and my fine sense of morality (more on this later I fear...) What I'm after with my son is basically what every parent has been after since day one - a better life for their child. With my skewed world-view however, I may end up creating some John Woo/Desperado/Jet Lee monstrosity with unlimited power...

Oh well, back to the drawing board.